Naomi Chaimov will never forget the morning of October 7, 2023.
“My husband, Aharon, was a senior driver for Magen David Adom (MDA), and his ambulance was parked next to our home,” said the 27-year-old from Ofakim.
“When the rockets started, we went downstairs to the safe room in our building. At 6:55 a.m., they called from Magen David Adom and said that terrorists were shooting at Kibbutz Urim, next to Ofakim. Aharon jumped into the ambulance to go help, but the terrorists killed him almost immediately.”
Their daughter, Hila, was three, and their son, Ari, almost two, when their father was killed.
Devastating news
That morning, after being permitted to leave the safe room, Chaimov went to her parents’ home, also in Ofakim. It was there she heard the tragic news that Aharon had been killed.
“Aharon was very gentle, and everybody remembers his smile and his eyes,” she said. “He really was very special. Everyone enjoyed talking to him, and he had such a great personality and good character. He was so good to the children and to our parents.”
Chaimov, then a 25-year-old widow with two toddlers, stayed with her parents for six months trying to recover from the tremendous loss of her husband.
She quit her job as a bookkeeper – and hasn’t gone back to work since.
Path to recovery
After six months, Chaimov rented her own apartment in Ofakim and “tried to create as normal a life as possible for the children.”
She said that for the first year and a half, she couldn’t even think about dating or getting remarried.
“In the beginning, I never thought I would meet someone,” she said. “But I gave room for the pain, and slowly I worked on healing myself and bringing life back to what it was as much as possible.
“I want to give everything to my kids. I am working on healing my soul, and slowly I took a small step – I started dating,” she said, adding that suddenly something in her shifted.
A new life
A few months ago, her sister-in-law introduced her to Avner Yosefi, a 38-year-old kashrut supervisor from Jerusalem, who is divorced and has three daughters, ages 14, 11, and 6.
“Avner, he is also very special – he is sensitive and respectful,” Chaimov told The Jerusalem Report. “He says that everything we went through is only for the good. In the beginning it may look bad, but God only brings good things for us.”
The two recently got engaged, and they have yet to set a date for the wedding.
Chaimov received support from OneFamily, a nonprofit organization that assists victims of terror, which includes offering retreats for bereaved widows, summer camps for orphaned children, financial aid, and advocacy.
Yael Shevach, who works for OneFamily, was widowed when her husband, Raziel, was killed in a terror attack in 2018. She said that the most complicated aspect for bereaved widows is the situation for the children, especially older children.
“There are a lot of questions that need to be answered even before forming a new relationship,” she said, explaining that much of the focus is on how best to combine the two families. She said that OneFamily recommends that widows continue psychological counseling while dating to handle any issues that arise.
According to data collected by OneFamily, there are an estimated 400 widows from October 7. About 10 have remarried.
Love from above
Chaimov said she is very open with her children, even though they are very young.
“I always explain everything to them in a language that they can understand,” she said.
“Even before I met Avner, I spoke to them and told them that maybe I’ll get married again. At first they didn’t like the idea, but slowly they got used to it, and now they want it to happen,” she said, adding that the children and her new beau “all get along well.”
She said that her [religious] faith has strengthened her during this period, and she believes that Aharon would support her decision to remarry.
“I know that Aharon wanted the best for us,” she declared. “I believe he is watching from above and helped me find a good second father for the children, even though he will always be their father.”■